My Bipolar Journal – Episode 73
June 18, 2007
I woke up so happy and now I'm just annoyed. It's not the end of the world or anything. Just something to get out of my system and move on with. I had some really awesome dreams yesterday. Every two or three months my insomnia catches up with me and I sleep for pretty much the entire day. That day was yesterday. Yeah, it kind of screws with you, but I did force myself to get up and go out with Luke and we had beverages down at a hole in the wall redneck-liscious bar in Anderson, so that made me feel slightly less of a bum.
I signed a lease for my new apartment today and just realized that I still have to come up with another several hundred dollars because I didn't understand something. I can't wait to live on my own again though. I'll make it happen one way or the other. I feel like my life has been completely invaded right now. Some of it doesn't bother me and the rest of it sits so close to the surface of my skin that I feel like vomiting. I'm not that private of a person or anything, but I miss having my own space. It makes me anxious and irritated and annoyed. All things I hate being.
More psychos have attracted themselves to me and so that's been entertaining. I realize that like attracts like, but there's the psycho you deal with that is annoying to be around and the kind of psycho where you feel like you have to sleep with one eye open.
I suspect that in one month things will be smashing once again. I have lots of visitors to look forward to, lots of rock to help make happen and plenty of places to visit! Who could ask for anything more! Well, me apparently, but I try not to. I really am lucky. I have all the friends I need, but I know there will be more made. I have the job that I've always wanted and it will only get better. I have entertainment, I have love, I have good books, I have good music, I just need to get over my annoyance. And I will.... in exactly one hour. I'll give myself that hour and then I'm done.
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