My Bipolar Journal – Episode 147
November 5, 2007
Yes, two in one day. Nearly in the same portion of the day. I guess I’m catching up. I’m very upset though. I fear one of the best friendships and best loves I’ve ever felt has ended. I lost my pill on the floor somewhere and I’m sad. I want to say mean things, do mean things, but I can’t. Conditioning tells me I cannot. Someone’s sad, depraved version of maturity says that I can’t behave the way my heart and soul want to. I don’t want to be the bigger person. Just this once. I want to run out to recess and beat up the people who have made me feel this way and if I get detention it’s just too damned bad. I can’t agree with a world that allows people to turn down the best friendships, the best love and the best experiences they could ever have because of what we are all “supposed” to do as conditioned robots.
FREEDOM DOESN’T EXIST!
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